It’s no longer the baseball preseason. Time to get your ass fired up for the regular fall season of America’s Pastime. Read all our playoff team previews here. Today, you’re getting to know … THE CHICAGO CUBS. Who are the Cubs? The Cubs are, spiritually speaking, the only possible team that could go 97-65 and still end up third in their own division without it surprising you at all. Meanwhile, the drunken North Side dudebros who cheer this team on make this the ONE fanbase out there for whom the prospect of temporarily limited bathroom availability represents a true crisis. WHERE DO I PISS? OH DEAR GOD WHERE DO I PISS?! (pisses on a nearby dog) What guys should you know? Pitcher Jake Arrieta is a guy! He’s 21-6 with a 1.82 ERA this season, which sounds pretty fucking awesome. He’s 10-0 with an 0.44 ERA since the beginning of August! If I know the Cubs, I know they will try to ride this poor man like a pack mule, have him throw 200 pitches in the play-in game, and somehow compromise both their playoff run and his career in the process. Also, rookie slugger Kris Bryant is a guy! The Cubs held him down in the minors earlier this season just to squeeze an extra year of service out of him before he can become eligible as a free agent, but it turned out to not be all that big a deal. Cubs fans dream about him and first baseman Anthony Rizzo hitting 30 dingers apiece for the next 15 years; probably they’ll both fall in open manhole covers. Since we all know some shitty hitter will come up in a tight spot for them in the playoffs and fuck it all up, be sure to make note of backup catcher David Ross, a vaunted leader of men who’s hit .179 in 156 at-bats. That’s probably the guy about whom you will bellow, “WHO THE FUCK IS THIS GUY AND WHY IS HE PINCH HITTING?!” A GIF of a Cubs fan Can they beat the Cardinals? BAHAHAHAHAHA LIKE THAT IDEA COULD EVER SERIOUSLY BE ENTERTAINED. These are the Cubs, which means they’ll be LUCKY if they make it deep enough to get blown to pieces by their Gosh Brigade rivals down south. Who has the best baseball chin? That would be reliever Fernando Rodney. Fine baseball chin. Why you should root for the Cubs I spent three years of my childhood living a few blocks from Wrigley Field, and so I’m biased here when I say I think that the Cubs—despite their historic run of futility and their fans’ cutesy love affair WITH that futility—are infinitely more charming than the Red Sox, and always have been. There is no Shank in Chicago. No Simmons. No Affleck. Half of comedian Twitter does not cheer for them. The percentage of dirty stubble at Cubs games is a good 15 percent less than that at Fenway. Bill Murray likes the Cubs, man. The rest of the Deadspin staff do not share my opinion about the Cubs. They find them gross and obnoxious and only slightly less precious than the Cardinals. And given that Mike Wilbon, who sucks, cheers for this team, I can’t argue against that viewpoint. BUT … as a neutral observer, the 2003 baseball playoffs were fucking incredible, and would have been that much MORE incredible if the Cubs had won it all. I would much prefer to see a historically downtrodden team like the Cubs or even the Mets get over the hump than spend another goddamn fall watching the goddamn Cardinals wipe their smarmy goddamn taint all over everything. Deep down, I will always root for the cliché. There’s no way I’m gonna cheer when Steve Bartman goes up to grab that ball and the boring-ass Marlins end up profiting from it. I want history. I want the Cubs to finally Do It. Only then will it be time to turn on them for good. Photos via Getty Relatedsports betting calculatorsvegas parlay calculatormoneyline to percentage calculatorhalf point odds calculatorkelly criterion bet calculatorhedge betting calculatorspread bettingbetting over undersports parlaysround robinoptimal ev bettingwhat does hedge mean in betting
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Liverpool manager Brendan Rodgers is sure he will sign a new contract with the club at season s end.
The Northern Irishman has led his side to within touching distance of a first league title in 24 years, sitting five points clear at the top.
Rodgers signed a three-year deal in June 2012, but – having seen his team definitely into next season s UEFA Champions League at the very least – he is expected to earn a new contract.
There is nothing really until the end of the season, but there is no doubt that at some point we will agree another deal, the 41-year-old said.
I am sure of that.
While several clubs are expected to be interested in Rodgers, the former Swansea manager said he still had a lot to achieve at Liverpool.
Pride would be a good word …
Celta de Vigo goalkeeper Yoel Rodriguez said interest in coach Luis Enrique from Barcelona has come because he s done things well here .
The Galicia-based club are safe from the relegation mire, 10 points clear of the drop zone with three games to play, and occupy a spot in the top half of the La Liga table.
Enrique s ability to steer Celta to 12 wins and seven draws in 35 matches has seen him linked to replace Gerardo Martino, who is under increasing pressure to keep his job after what could be a trophy-less season at Camp Nou.
But Yoel said Enrique still has three games to go before he can consider any job offers.
First he has to finish the season here and then later, the boss will take whatever decision he needs to take, the shot-stopper said.
If the cal…
Manchester City manager Roberto Mancini has praised his influential midfielder Yaya Toure, describing him as being like Ruud Gullit .
The Ivorian was instrumental in his side s potentially title-clinching win over Newcastle on Sunday, scoring twice late on to further loosen United’s grip on the Premier League trophy.
Although Mancini insists the midfielder is not carrying the team on his own, he is well aware of the attributes the 28-year-old brings to the team and has compared him to the Netherlands’ Euro 1988-winning captain Gullit.
Yaya is fantastic because he has everything he is strong, quick, has good technique, and can play in different positions, Mancini told reporters.
He is like (Ruud) Gullit for me a player of that kind. But he can t pla…
Reigning champions Western Sydney Wanderers are looking forward to renewing rivalries with Guangzhou Evergrande in the AFC Champions League.
Wanderers became the first Australian side to lift the trophy when they defeated Al Hilal 1-0 on aggregate in the final last month.
Having defeated 2013 champions Evergrande on away goals at the quarter-final stage, the A-League outfit were paired with the CSL side in Thursday s draw.
The two clubs will compete in Group H, along with the third-placed side in Japan s J.League and whe winner of play-off one (east).
Wanderers representative Christian Layland is expecting another closely fought encounter when the two sides meet again, after their last-eight clash back in August ended 2-2 on aggregate.
We had…
Manchester United s humiliating 7-0 defeat to Liverpool was an accident , believes Real Betis president Angel Haro, who expects a response when his side face the Red Devils on Thursday.
Betis travel to Old Trafford four days after United suffered the joint-heaviest competitive defeat in the club s history at Anfield.
Only a week on from their EFL Cup triumph, Erik ten Hag s men were ruthlessly dismantled by Jurgen Klopp s hosts to hand them just their second loss of the calendar year.
But with a Europa League last-16 first leg next on the agenda, Haro says Betis must be ready to battle against a fiery response from the Red Devils.
[Their loss] is an accident, in an important rivalry, he told Marca. You have to look at Manchester United in recent games, w…
Macarthur are a game away from the Grand Final in their inaugural A-League season after winning 2-0 in extra time with 10 men at Central Coast Mariners.
James Meredith came closest to breaking the deadlock during a cagey 90 minutes, Mariners goalkeeper Mark Birighitti making a stunning save from his towering header, but the Macarthur defender would not complete the match.
Meredith clumsily pulled back Marco Urena with 15 minutes of regulation remaining and referee Shaun Evans assertion that it amounted to a professional foul was upheld by the VAR.
Macarthur managed to see things through until the whistle and then hit the front three minutes into the first additional period via an own goal.
COMETH THE MAN, COMETH THE M MOMBWA
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Competition: Serie A
Market: Inter Milan to beat Crotone
Odds:
Serie A continues this weekend with even more action that will bring goals, excitement and controversy. The league table has remained incredibly tight as every single spot is hotly contested meaning that the three points on offer can often see a team rise up a number of places. With this in mind, Inter Milan host Crotone on Saturday.
Inter Milan had been in fine form this season, but in recent weeks they have stalled massively, with the wins drying up. After 22 games they have won 12, drawn eight and lost twice, while they have scored 37 goals and conceded 17 times. In their last five they have not won a single game, losing once and drawing four times. This has seen Inter onto 44 po…
Diego Simeone isn t surprised by Valencia s lofty LaLiga position this season but hopes his Atletico Madrid side can put a dent in their Champions League dreams.
The Wanda Metropolitano stages the battle between second and third in the table on Sunday, with Atleti holding a six-point cushion over their opponents heading into a crucial fixture for both clubs.
Valencia endured a turbulent 2016/17 campaign, eventually finishing in 12th position for a second successive season after interim manager Voro Gonzalez steered them away from the relegation zone.
However, now under the guidance of Marcelino, they are fighting at the top end of the table and, despite Valencia s 4-1 home loss to Real Madrid last week, Simeone expects a tight game between the top-four contende…
According to a report on Sky Sports, Hertha Berlin have secured Liverpool striker Andriy Voronin on a one year loan deal.
The 29-year old Ukranian international joined the Kop for the 2007-2008 season from Bayer Leverkusen but never became a fixture in the First XI making just 19 appearances for the club.
He has now decided to return to Germany in hopes of more regular first team football.
[Source: Sky Sports]
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FranceÂ’s national coach Raymond Domenech is under extreme pressure at present to keep his job.
After a poor Euro 2008 and his early 1 – 3 loss on Saturday to Austria in Group Seven, a team ranked just beyond 100 in the world rankings, time must be running out for the coach.
Prior to the match against Austria the French Federation had given the fifty six year old Domenech a target of five points in the first three matches. With the loss on Saturday this becomes two victories in two matches, the first of which will be on Wednesday against Serbia.
Domenech has been in charge of the French national side since 2004 and was himself a French international who played as a defender.
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